MB your face!

i received a letter from a foreign client and he is as usual as bad as he was. i wonder if he knows the etiquette when coordinating with your consultants. He doesn't know how to appreciate work and all he cares about is how to look for the mistakes. He keeps on revising our plans and expect us to finish our work in a day or two. How are you supposed to finish a 10 hectare project in a day?! I wish he thought of that.

i understand that some foreigners are straight to the point and one cannot be sensitive at work but you have an attitude that i cannot stand. you're a day sucker! i really don't like you. seriously. if i could only curse you or recite a chant that would make you kinder, i would do it right now. you are really annoying! hmpf!

i've tried looking for you...

and i can't find you. i wonder if you ever tried looking for my posts and if you can read them all. i couldn't find you until i came to the realization that why should i even bother?!

we're done. i can't move on if i won't let you go and so i must STOP.

i was just wondering if you ever think of me. i miss you but i cannot accept the fact that i was your "last choice."

and so i must STOP.

=(

What now?!

Here is me asking for a thousand times with a thousand questions. Worries about the future while the future doesn't even stop for a while to take me into consideration. 
Funny though.. i have a few plans that i'd like to happen now but apparently, it doesn't take a minute to get it. 


For instance, i'd like to have a good-pay-job, not that i don't have one but its not enough. If i get one, i have to sacrifice the liberty of time that i'm getting now. I can achieve the first goal if i finish my thesis so I could get my master's degree which is i am doing now. So it needs my time, effort and perseverance to hit the first goal. 


I would like to invest into something but i have no way of doing that if i couldn't get my first goal. You see... this is me. Thinking of so much when all the answer is in front of me. I just have to plan all these things so i can put in into their respective places. 


I will end this post with my story recently. I went to the bank to find out how much i needed to maintain my account and found out that i am less halfway of my funds to keep it. Apparently, i cannot think of anything else to retain my account. I have checked my bills, counted everything else and still no answer to my predicament. Three more days before the closure of my account, my Aunt emailed me and attached to it is a receipt of the money transferred into my account. An amount much more than i needed to keep my passbook. ;-) 


This is my lesson for the week... life is like a movie... rescue comes at the end when the action has ended and in real life, it still feels good to get that help. It carries that your hopes happen when you never let go of your faith. 

Ang diwata at ang dyosa

Year 2007 when i first met her. Such a quiet girl, absolutely and i mean ABSOLUTELY opposite of how i've known her in the chatroom. Sweet, thoughtful and emotional girl. Sometimes, it gets too thick that it feels like she's possessive. Maybe she is or maybe she's not. I must admit I have a few moments of confusion with her character but I get by. I'm pretty sure she feels the same thing, the annoyance. We had the best and worst times, most of the times are the best only because we try not to  tell each other that we're pissed in our own ways. She hates me for being insensitive at times and i hate her for being too sensitive most of the time. Funny, isn't it, but its true that opposite attracts. She got this laugh that fills the room, the humor that boys cannot ignore and the sexuality that one cannot understand. Yeah, she has a lot of boys but not "the man". Just like me, we're both trying to find a guy that will make us happy and pop the statement of "Marry Me!" and we're both still looking for one. hahaha! 


You see, when i started this particular post, i wanted to rant about her sensitivity and being inconsiderate in my situation for the past few days. Surprisingly, i'm not mad at her now but i still carry this feeling of hope that she will understand that i am not like her who loves to have many friends around, who likes to shout what's happening to me over the net every hour and that her friendship feels "nakakasakal" sometimes. But I can't change her and so can she and so by being honest with her the last time, i take the consequence of getting a cold treatment. But whatever she feels, i'm still her friend. Just the same, i love her even if she thinks i don't. 


Happy Birthday, jows! May you find the right man for you and have a family of your own in no time. :) I love you, always! 

our windy summer

This is the condition of the sea at 6:00 in the morning before we start sailing for 2 hours. it was a great feeling and i stayed most of the time in front of the bangka. on our way there, i have been constantly praying that the sun will come out in time for our arrival.

I met new friends. i even met a priest, a whole family were there. all sorts of people and most of them are good ones. we stayed in a resort with 8-door rooms and i stayed in a room with three of my friends. the food was great. superb actually that not even a single shot of photo was taken because its really inviting. The owner, Aling Linda, was very humble and accommodating. If it wasn't for the food, i would say that that vacation sucks. But she and her staff did a great job. I enjoyed my friends', old and new, company. We drink, we laughed and some even cried. 

As we hop from one island to another, i realized how smart God is to making this beautiful sceneries and how lucky we are to see His creations. I couldn't believe that we have all been travelling in an almost endless sea and with much more beauties in the other side.





The sand bar is one of the highlighted features in Caramoan Island featuring a low-level sea water at the middle of the sea. Nipa huts was made at the top of the fine white sand.

If there's one thing that i learned from this trip is that no matter how bad the things can be, we can always make ourselves happy. It will always depend on how we look at it. There was rain when we get there, the wind was unstoppable, but we still enjoyed the trip. It was a bit disappointing not to see the other side of Caramoan, but hey! its one reason to go back, right?

Do not frown when things go wrong. Do not curse when things fall apart. We are way too better than that. Enjoy life! Dive in! :)

nothingness

Only when you're alone, you can find peace. That's what many philosophers say. Not that i don't believe in them, but i guess even in the midst of a turmoil you can feel the tranquility when you really have it. Take note...when you have it.. not when you need it. I am single. That's one admission i have never said for a long time for a lot of reasons and that includes complications in my relationships. But surprisingly, i am satisfied with what i have now. i am not seeking for more and i am not anxious of knowing what will i be doing the next day because i am bored and trying to kill the boredom by having coffee with some friends whom you sometimes feel that they're just using you because they also feel the same way. Confusing? nevermind. that's not the point of this blog, anyway. All i am saying is there will be a point in your life that you will stop wanting everything because you will realize that its better to have nothing and be happy with it than have everything yet you still crave for more.

i will continue this later and hoping that i still have the same aura.

Faith, Hope and Love

A hot air balloon needs a fire to keep it warm and to be lifted up. It takes a lot of effort to keep that warm air to sustain its level up in the air. Like any relationship, it takes two to tango, there's give and take and there's happiness and sadness. At the moment, i am not happy but i am not sad as well. I am like a balloon that has enough fire to keep me above and keep my sanity intact. My partner said he's getting numbed, maybe i am but i deny to be one.. numbed until my heart feels nothing at all. 


Tonight, i learned that there is one love that will always be undefined and will remain that way until noone-knows-when. Tonight, i have learned to let go of what we have been trying so hard to happen. Tonight, my faith touched me once again, that there will always be one true love in your life. It can make you cry but deep inside you, the belief that its purity will always stay whatever may happen. The Bible said it right and proved to a human like me that Love is patient and love is kind... it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it is not easily angered. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 


In time, i am hoping you can read this... beside me. Then I may say, WE persevered because it is really a TRUE LOVE. :) 
**************


1 Corinthian 13:4-7 
 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.